A dog's health is more than just physical, and I look out for the mental aspect as well. I've set out to put your mind at ease explaining how to handle human inventions without taking a toll on your mental health. After all, it is a human's world and we're just living in it.
My human has told me that these things are called “amboolances” and they’re for when important things are happening, like when a hooman is hurt and needs a vet. When encountered with these, be sure to howl as loud as possible to reassure the humans that you’re available to help. See below for a perfect example.
Image credit: aretehs
2. Springy metal door evil things
My human said that they’re called “door stoppers”, but I call them “springy metal door evil things”. She said it’s an important part of the house so that things don’t crash into other things and damage things and I’ll be honest I wasn’t really listening that well because I was hungry. How do you handle these? See below for how to test it out and make sure it’s springy enough to keep your human’s house safe.
Image credit: pics4world
3. Sell fone
I can’t be the only one that got confused with the shiny metal rectangle loud thing. My human calls it a “sell fone”. There may come a time when a human points the sell fone at you. DO NOT BE ALARMED. YOUR HUMAN IS NOT TRAPPED IN THE SHINY METAL RECTANGLE. YES, THAT IS YOUR HUMAN’S FACE AND VOICE BUT THEY ARE OKAY. This is how humans communicate sometimes, like when we bark at night. The appropriate response is confusion, let’s face it. Sell fones are weird.
Image credit: apple
4. The thing you see yourself in AKA “mirawrs”
Mirawrs are horrible and there is no way to avoid them. My hooman says that mirrors exist to look at yourself, but I don’t know why I would need to look at myself. I look great every day and so does my human. Humans make weird inventions though and there is a proper way to handle “mirawrs”. Unfortunately, it’s something that only develops over time. It’s only natural that your first encounter will be like the one below, but just remember that it’s YOU in the reflection and that your human IS safe.
Image credit: horchow
This is definitely a human invention. My human says that dogs in the wild don’t get baths, but that I should be happy to be so clean. I would prefer to be nice and dirty, it took a lot of work to get that mud all over me! I’ve learned, though, that getting dirty right after your bath will only lead to a second bath. So what’s the proper way to handle a bath? There is no proper way. You can’t avoid it and all you can do is try to get as many treats as possible. The more you wiggle around, the more treats they give you to calm down, so wiggle!
Image credit: dogtagart